sleep issues

How can your child's sleep torture you so much that it causes you to be up all night, then think all day about it, yet never come up with a plan that lasts more than 24 hours without being questioned, doubted and redefined. Am I indecisive or just plain crazy?

We moved Noah into Dylan's bedroom last night. I had this grand plan - I would not nurse him (which I already was trying not to do between 11 and 5am) but make him go to sleep on his own - checking on him periodically. I knew it would interrupt Dylan's sleep, but I just figured I would dive in headfirst. I prepared her, and she really did pretty good. The first time he woke her up at 11:56 I thought they were both never going to stop crying. She eventually calmed down, but Noah? He was standing up awake and screaming crying from 11:56 until about 2:15. I went in every 15 minutes and reassured him. But it never stopped. Finally at 2:15 I put my hand on his back as he laid down until he fell asleep. It only took about 5 minutes. But then he was up again at 3:30. So, I did the same thing - holding my hand on his back until he fell back asleep. And he did, until about 4:50. When he woke up this time I was beat. I hadn't slept since 11:56 - questioning myself, doubting myself, trying to psyche myself up for this "sleep training." But I was done. So, I brought him into bed and nursed him back to sleep, and did that off and on for the next two hours. At least he wasn't crying anymore...

This sucks. I'm now at bedtime, night two. And I totally feel like I am doing the wrong thing. I know he needs to sleep in his own bed now - for my sanity if nothing else. And I think he should be in there with Dylan. Those things I believe. But how to make that happen is totally in question. I don't think I'm doing the right thing by leaving him in there to figure it out, so I guess I'll try to help him get back asleep tonight right away - with my hand on his back? If he can't fall asleep on his own at the beginning of the night - how am I expecting him to do so in the middle of the dark night?

Now you've seen a window to my crazy sleep world of doubt. You probably stopped reading this post last paragraph, but that's ok, it's therapeutic for me anyhow.
Why can't this be easier? Nothing in all of my three years, one month and thirteen days of parenting has caused more frustration.

I am so unsure of what I should be doing right now. So if I seem a little obsessed with pediatric sleep issues, you now know why. I need therapy.

a day in the life

Note: this post is insanely long. It is inspired by my sister Lara, who wanted to answer the question she always got from people who didn't quite understand the stay at home mom thing: What do you DO all day? Here goes...

6:02. Dylan wakes up (still thankfully on New Mexico time) and Jason goes in, convinces her to lay down for another 30 minutes so we can all sleep.

6:32. Dylan can't wait to play any longer. With daddy's permission, she gets up and plays quietly on the floor reading books and drawing with her magna-doodle.

6:58. Daddy gets up to get ready for work. Dylan comes in to wake up mommy and Noah. She brings every book (around 25), stuffed animal and the magna-doodle that she was playing with onto our bed.

7:06. I get up to make coffee - I can barely keep my eyelids open...this must happen now. Noah comes with me and Dylan stays on our bed reading for awhile.

7:25. Dylan comes out and decides she wants pancakes for breakfast. Why not? So, she comes up on the counter and helps me mix up some batter. (i'm trying to be more spontaneous)

8:03. Pancakes are done. Pancake picnic in the kitchen!! (this picture is what started this post)

8:10. Noah takes his straw out of his milk cup for the 5th time, dripping it all over the floor. OK. All done.

8:12. Noah and Dylan are blissfully playing in the family room by themselves. Right next to each other. Not bothering each other!! Quick, get a picture! I take a few moments to check my email.

8:17. Dylan asks, "Do I have a Pull-up on?" Me: Yes. "Then I'm going to poop in my Pull-up." Me: Why don't we go poop in the potty? Dylan: "No, I'll just poop in my Pull-up." (we have only been potty-trained for about a week now, so we got the peeing down pat, but mister poop is still iffy)

8:32. Diaper changes for both. Dylan gets on underpants. Noah escapes and runs NAKED BABY around the room playing ball.

8:40. Noah sits in front of the kitchen wall and throws the ball against it and back to himself repeatedly. I remember some stories about Jason doing this sort of thing with balls when he was little. Let the obsession with sports begin. I take this opportunity to empty the dishwasher.

9:15. I catch a quick shower (phew). Dylan reads to Noah on our bed, showing him the pictures so sweetly. Noah "listens" in crib.

9:30. Dylan and Noah want to play legos. No, trains. No, legos. No, trains. Noah: Help mommy!

9:39. We did it! Finished track. Dylan creates a track jam with her foot. Noah is not amused.
10:01. Yogurt snack!

10:19. Our friends arrive (Calvin is on the right - I babysit for him two mornings a week. Megan with Ruby and Iain on left)! Train fun for all.

10:24. Noah and Ruby love. They are literally hugging every 5 seconds for awhile. It's overwhelmingly adorable.

10:50. Bike time! Noah got this great little bike as a hand-me-down from our friends the Steelbergs at church. Thanks Cameron and Graham! He loves it.

11:03. Dylan and Calvin build castles in the playroom. Dylan tries to verbally keep Noah from knocking them down. (look at Noah eyeing Calvin's tower)

11:04. Noah tries to knock them down, but he gets diverted by dumping out all the kitchen stuff and then tossing it one by one back into the box.

11:41. Lunch time. Vegetable appetizers while the pasta cooks. Dylan eats the carrots but skips the broccoli and snow peas.

12:12. Ruby and Noah are still eating lunch. Ruby keeps taking bites from Noah's pasta bowl. Noah keeps eating the noodles with his fingers. There might not be anything messier for two one year olds than a bowl of slippery noodles with red sauce. This picture is just after Ruby stole Noah's carrot from his tray and now she's trying to feed it to herself whole on the fork. Noah looks to be in a trance and hasn't noticed...or cared.

12:45. Clean up time! We set the timer for 4 minutes and all run around the house like crazy while we put every toy in sight away. The kids do awesome and even Noah and Ruby try and "help." Cleaning up is always easier with a timer to beat!

1:00. Downtime. Megan, Ruby and Iain have gone home, so Calvin, Dylan, Noah and I sit on the couch to read for awhile before Calvin's mom comes to pick him up. Noah falls asleep nursing. I successfully transfer him to the crib (after some crying, falls back asleep).

1:35. Dylan and I read stories together in her bed. Today it's "Not THAT Bear," "Happy Father's Day" and "Pig Pig Rides Again." It's a rare treat to get to do this just the two of us since Noah is asleep. After a cuddle, an animal and a stack of books, it's time for quiet time.

2:04. Seriously, whoa. I have a few minutes to myself. This is divine and I can now catch up on writing this long entry (while watching a few minutes of tivoed So You Think You Can Dance).

3:05. Just finished writing and uploading pics. Noah woke up 30 minutes ago and is now sleeping on my lap as I type on the laptop.

Jason will be home soon so I can run to the doctor. So, I'll sign off for now and stop carrying my camera around. Hopefully now you get a better picture of how full a day can be - even when you are a "homemaker." :)

kite festival!

This is an old post, but in the effort to put up new pictures, here goes.

On May 10th we attended a kite festival on the lawn of the Museum of Science and Industry. It was so fun - even though it was freezing and not real spring weather. Dylan and Noah loved the kites and Dylan especially got so excited that we got to fly our very own kite (which she had gotten for her birthday). We were able to make our own kite (cheap paper thing that we ended up throwing away - she wasn't that into it by the time we did it - we were FREEZING). We visited a storybook bus where they got to go inside the world of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. And Jason got to play Mariokart Wii (and loved it so much we went out and bought the game later that day). But most of all, best of all, we FLEW KITES!!

Putting together the new birthday present kite. Dylan is staring in amazement at the sky filled with kites!

Dylan and Noah in front of the Museum of Science and Industry enjoying the kite festival. Still waiting for Jason to put the kite together. :)


Noah is so pleased with himself walking in the grass.


Jason and Dylan try to get the kite up. Repeatedly. It was really really windy.


It's up!!!!!!


Dylan flying to kite (see her holding it?) with daddy's help.


The kite festival!

i do!!

Noah has his first sentence!

I guess I say this phrase a lot..."Who wants to _________"
And then we all raise our hands and say.... "I DO!!"

And yes, Noah now joins in wholeheartedly. He says it almost like it's one word..."EYEDOOO!"

So...
"Who wants to go outside?" "I do!"
"Who wants to go to Grandma's house?" "I do!"
"Who wants a snack?" "I do!"
"Who wants to take a bath?" "I do!"
"Who wants to color?" "I do!"

Really, anything his sister does, is "I do!"

trip to the farm

We visited Cosley Zoo with Grandma Karen yesterday. It's really more of a children's farm than a zoo, but they have a few more animals than a normal farm (i.e. peacocks, foxes, coyotes, turtles, etc.).

The kids had a fun time and really enjoyed seeing all the animals, that is except for the peacock. I forgot just how loud they can be...

Peacock: SQWUAAAAAAAAAACCCKKK!
Dylan: under breath, starting to walk briskly away..."Let's go. I'm freakin' out."

I'll post pictures soon - I can't find my cord to transfer from the camera. I have good one with noah and the llama.

let's go over this one more time...

Jason: Dylan, who plays left field for the Cubs?
Dylan: (shyly) Alfonso Soriano
Jason: Who plays right field?
Dylan: (eyes rolling, shaking head) Kosuke Fukudome
Jason: (smiling and trying to keep from cracking up)

my poor kids...let the random memorization of your future school-aged life begin now.

screw the terrible twos

It's been a long time. And i apologize for the lack of posts.


Dylan is now officially three years old. Hard to believe it. But yet, not so hard to believe if I look at how our daily whine factor, defiant factor and just plain frustration factor has gone WAY up. My sweet little cuddle bug can be quite the hair pulling button pusher.

Some days (like today) it just seems as though she got up on the wrong side of the bed. Is that possible for kids? I thought only adults had bad moods where everything just seems to go wrong.

Dylan is officially 32 lbs, 37.5 inches tall. She is right on schedule for all development and did really great in her 3-year old appt where she had to get a finger prick for a lead test. "I am worried about the prick..." But then she didn't even feel it - and enjoyed a pink Pez post-prick.

She really is a wonderful, sweet, caring little girl. Her personality and sense of humor evolve more each day and I am amazed at what she is able to figure out on her own these days. She is becoming more and more independent and sometimes it crushes me how fast she is growing up. Our favorite way to get her to eat vegetables, drink milk, etc. is to say, "Don't drink the milk. I don't want you to grow up anymore. I want you stay little forever!!" And then of course she is cracking up and yelling "I will grow up! I'm going to!!" And she drinks and drinks and drinks and it's happiness for all.

Here are a few of her current faves:

Favorite toys: people - as in fisher price little people to make up stories with, magna-doodle, any art supplies (especially markers)

Favorite music: Ralph's World, Sesame Street songs

Favorite thing to watch: Super Why on PBS

Favorite place on earth: the hot tub at "grandma cindy's cabin"

Favorite drink: chocolate milk

Favorite dinner: Thai noodles (pad thai) with peanut sauce

Favorite dessert: tie between popsicles or ice cream

Favorite color: pink most often, but depends on the day

Favorite obsession: ballet, ballerinas, dancing, tutus, anything FANCY

Favorite book (see above): Fancy Nancy

Favorite lastest quote: "Ooh-lah-lah, my family is posh!" (yeah, see favorite book...)

What a girl!